Reading Rage

Sitting on the other side of a littered kitchen table, he sits, unmoving. Allowing his eyes to smolder in my direction is all he can do, for he doesn’t like where this is going. Once more I’ve said something wrong, chosen a bad topic, and now he’s pissed as hell. Remaining quiet, he gets a question fired in his direction; it’s a selfish move, but I need to hear his voice. I shut my eyes to listen; his voice confirms that he’s angry. But what tells me this? His signs. Like any person, he has signs that give away his anger. Learning the general signs can help when dealing with situations like this.

Merely observing a person’s body language will allow you to see the fuse shorten as their temper is ignited. A lot of the time, a person who is angry will be incredibly tense. Her hands will be clenched, even if it’s to the point where her nails are digging into her palm. His jaw may be clenched as if he’s caging his tongue, preventing it from forming words he’ll later regret. Another tension can be seen in the eyes, which are either narrowed or widened with intense fury. Then there’s also the fidget factor; this is when the person is so pissed that they can’t sit still. Like the kid in school; the one who will spend entire classes starting back, shifting forward, readjusting his baseball hat, and leaning back again. Then again, it could also be the girls who draw figure eights with their feet by crossing and uncrossing their legs. All of which are noticeable changes; at least, when you’re looking for them.

On top of body language, there’s various tell tale signs in the voice. An aggravated person will usually get a hard voice. It doesn’t have many fluctuations, or in other words, it is very close to being monotone. The words will be very staccato; a word will only be drawn out when the person is trying to control his anger. When the control fails completely, the words become voluminous and direct. The direct aspect has to do with insults. The more a person tries to control her anger, the more subtle her insults will be. On the other hand, should she lose control, the insults will be a flat out “you suck.” Also, control usually gives more logical insults, where as no control leads to insulting just for the sake of insulting. Telling that someone is angry can be done by just hearing their voice, as if you were on the phone.

Reading the anger within a person can be extremely difficult. While one of these may fit, angry may not be the reasoning. It requires knowing a person and having many of these fit the moment. Unless you get a rise out of a person being angry, I suggest either changing the subject or asking what’s wrong when these signs are seen. Knowing which to choose requires practice and observation, so don’t hesitate to put yourself out there in order to learn.

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